Big Love

Am I a sad or a smug single?

With Valentine’s Day coming up, seeing various cards and symbols of love both in stores and online, I’ve been thinking about love. In my typical arrangement of work and life, this represents a hole in my life.

I’m open to meeting other single people. I am open to dating. But I’m also content being alone. One thing that is for sure, I’m going to have to shake things up because I am just not meeting that many new people.

Last week I went to the movies and was one of two women in the theater. Never mind the death of theaters and how difficult it would be to meet someone while watching a movie in a dark theater. The potential of dates for me at present is at a solid zero.

When I am feeling a bit discouraged about ever meeting someone, dating, etc., I noticed that there are little signs signaling me to not give up. Some of these signs include: watching an older couple walk down my street holding hands, getting emotional in a rom com, dreams with a lover, and seeing images of happy couples in photos.

Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.

– Ronald Dahl

The most notable is the heart ache that I feel from time to time, usually during one of these signs.

Is it time to blow the dust off the ol’ heart, am I brave enough to face it?

I came across a meme, the setting is the stage in what looks like the 90’s when Apple announced some phone or something and Steve Jobs and a bunch of similar tech guys are dancing around, awkwardly. The caption read: 47 year old divorced dads that ghost me on Bumble.

I am clear though that I want to meet someone in Real Life. So I’ll have to get creative, get out, get to where the people go.

My River runs to thee by Emily Dickinson

My River runs to thee—
Blue sea! Wilt welcome me?
My River wait reply—
Oh Sea—look graciously—
I'll fetch thee Brooks
From spotted Nooks—
Say—Sea—Take Me!