Big Love

The case for expanders in your life

I was thumbing through a magazine when I came across an image of a smiling woman standing behind her desk. My first thought was, I want to feel like that!

I had just experienced an expander – someone who embodied something that I wish to embody. Happiness, confidence, success, beauty in mid-life. The woman, I read after I stopped browsing, was Nancy Meyers, a screen writer and producer and the article was on her home in Architectural Digest.

Meyers represented many things to me in the initial image. A successful woman in the world, a mother, a confident and attractive woman older than me, and a creator of entertainment and art. You’ve Got Mail, Sleepless in Seattle, Something’s Gotta Give, the list of her films goes on and on. She is very successful and beloved by her fans.

What is an expander?

In order to subconsciously know that something is achievable for ourselves, we need to see to believe. We need to expand our conscious mind and the limited ideas that it has, say, of success, or love. (https://tobemagnetic.com/tbm-blog/2017/4/24/the-unmet-self-manifestation)

Let’s talk about love.

I recently experienced an expander moment in love. A gorgeous man I would consider an acquaintance, and out of my league, crossed paths with me on a recent afternoon. He is also kind, polite, and interesting though I do not know him well. We exchanged waves and smiles from a distance, and that was it.

But…that exciting stomach feeling was there. So was my smile. And that feeling, that there is an attractive single man out there, that I can feel interest in someone again, and that there is a possibility of love, that inspires me. Opens me to optimism. Which in turn makes me more positive and therefore attractive.

C’est magnifique.

So, I love you because the entire universe conspired to help me find you.

Paulo Coehlo