Big Love

Quietly quitting in order to do less better

I decided to become a parent later in life. I had a full-time job, a commute, a partner, and pets. This may have been when I took on an “I can do it all mentality.”

Inevitably, something had to give. I couldn’t keep adding things to one side of the scale and expect it to remain in balance. Because it couldn’t, I literally and figuratively couldn’t do it all anymore. For example, the ridiculous notion that while pumping milk at work I also needed to be productive by working, two birds one pump. Looking back, I approached it all like I had something to prove. But to who?

Sometime this year I came across a saying that was attributed to the Buddha. It was about stopping. Resting. Doing nothing. You know how somethings you come across stay with you? This was one of those things.

Then I encountered the phrase “quietly quitting” on a Ted newsletter or post. The idea is to stop overdoing, over giving, over everything. The context I read about the idea was set in the work setting, which spoke to me. I had been over doing it, quietly taking on the work of two positions. And for what? Time to, as another saying that stuck with me on a bumper sticker put it, “Let that sh*t go.” Just let it go. Or like another bumper sticker, “That was Zen, this is Tao.”

Sometimes we need to receive the memo multiple times. I keep getting it. I was trying to do a lot and not doing any of it well. I constantly felt rushed, stressed, and all over the place. At times I still do. Pausing before the new year, I am ready to quietly quit the things that I just don’t have time and or energy for.

Looking for the Buddha saying on stopping, I found one that also resonated. “When you let go you create space for better things to enter your life.” There you go.